From Fireflies to Dust
by MelodyGrace1809
Summary: Cory and Topanga, what happened with Fireflies and how the lost years happened and ended. Three shot. I do not own Boy Meets World or Girl Meets World.
1. Journey to Fireflies

Cory:

For my whole life, since I can remember, all I have known is Topanga Lawrence. The six short years of my life have been completely occupied by that girl.

At age 1, one of my earliest memories is of me climbing over the rails of my crib to reach that of Topanga's. Or we would reach through the bars, if they were ever close enough.

A few months later, she said her first word. "Co-ry" and squealed, hugging me.

In nursery, we slept next to each other during nap time, and held hands. Cooties weren't a thing for us, despite the rest of the children declaring that they should be.

Just before 5, we met Shawn, when he fell into the llama pen. "The wife" I referred to her as. He was already in our school, but that was when the friendship started. In classes, with Mr Feeny of course, we were inseparable. Even Shawn supported it, yelling at Mr Feeny to leave us alone.

When she turned six, I gave her a candy ring. It was a new thing back then. Blue raspberry. I told her "when I'm older, I'm going to ask you to marry me with a proper ring"

Now we're six. Almost seven. Topanga is over, and the night is beautiful. In the backyard, we sit, gazing at the stars. And before I know it, something bright lands on my nose. Topanga gasps, "A firefly!" But the little creature flies away. She looks sad, before the air around us seems illuminated with little tiny lightning bugs.

"Mom, Dad!" I yell, and they come rushing outside. She is trying to touch them. "Can I catch one?"

"You can try" my mom tells me, and goes inside for a minute. She comes back with two nets and a jar. The jar has been poked in the top. She then hands a net each to Topanga and me.

"I'm going to catch the most beautiful firefly" for her. I don't say the last part out loud.

"Not if I do first."

It takes us some time to get used to using the nets. My mom demonstrates, catching one, then setting it free.

The first one, Topanga catches. She attempts to put it into the jar, but it escapes. She stays determined, though.

After I also fail to put one in the jar, Topanga catches another, bright firefly, and places it very carefully into the jar. Mom closes the lid, and it gracefully darts about, shining, inside. Mom gives me another identical jar, and soon, I catch my own.

My mother writes our names on the jars, and places them next to each other on the table.

"They are perfect!" Topanga yells, smiling from ear to ear.


	2. Fall to the ground

Yesterday was amazing. Our fireflies stayed outside, next to each other. Topanga went home, but she's supposed to come in a few minutes.

I need to be perfect for her. In my room... well mine and Eric's room, since Morgan just took my room, I took some of Eric's body spray and I sprayed it across my body. I think I used too much, though, because it's all I can smell in here.

Eric walks in and I throw the can under the desk. He then coughs, laughing. "Cor, have you been using my body spray?" He continues chuckling.

"Whats funny?" I ask him.

"Cor, why are you so bent up about Tomato?"

"Topanga" I correct him angrily.

"Ooh, no need to get feisty little bro, I'm just saying. It's not natural. Other people your age haven't been married for their entire lives. You aren't suppposed to like girls"

"Then what am I supposed to do?" I can't imagine not liking Topanga. She's been my whole life. But I listen to Eric, as he always gives me brotherly advice.

"When I was your age, I hated girls, and all my friends did too. They had 'cooties' " he waved his fingers in the air as he said it. "We used to argue with the girls in our class. It isn't cool to like a girl when you're a kid. We used to throw dirt at all the girls"

"Am... am I supposed to do that? How could I?" It seems impossible. But when is Eric wrong about what's cool, what people think and do?

"You can't be cool if you spend your whole school life with a girl. People will make fun of you, and you'll never get to have fun"

"Topanga's here, Cory!" I hear my Mom shout from downstairs.

"Throw... dirt" Eric reminds me. "Cmon, I'll take you downstairs." We walk together down the stairs, and Topanga is sitting on the couch.

"Hello, Cory!" Her voice shounds like anyone's my age, still a baby, but I know she is smart and spiritual, like her family. "Let's go outside and see our Fireflies"

She outstretches her hand to grab mine, but for the first time in my life, I pull away. My hand is sweaty, and I don't want her to know that I'm nervous, or trembling.

But she does. "Cory, why are you shaking? It's not cold" she looks concerned. "You seem upset" she declares as we walk outside."It must be because of all that body spray I can smell. So much of it, polluting the earth! How do you handle when your brother wears that much, and it rubs off on you!"

Eric looks offended, but I am relieved that she didn't know why I was upset. Still, I don't know what I'm going to do. She walks up to the jars, admiring the bugs inside.

"Wanna be cool little bro? Here's your chance!" Eric whispers into my ear.

I bend down and grab dirt in my hands, one clump in each. This might hurt me. But I can't cry. Not in front of her.

She doesn't turn around, but I hurl the dirt across the small gap between us, and it hits her shoulder. Now she turns around.

"What are you doing, Cory?" She asks calmly. "Are you angry at me?"

Without another word, I throw the other one at her, and it hits her in the stomach this time. Hard. The force winds her, and she grabs her tummy, slamming her back into the table. This knocks over the jars, which fall onto the floor, and smash. The little insects fly away into the day.

Instantly, my Mom starts running to help her up. "What happened?" She asks the girl.

"Cory...what's this about?" Topanga looks me in the eyes, and I fight every urge to let a tear escape, threat burning, chest heavy, head reeling.

"You're a girl. Girls have cooties. Girls are yucky, girls aren't cool. " I yell, at the top of my voice. It's the only way I can talk without crying.

With the help of my mom, Topanga makes her way inside, and out the door. I hear her crying, and I hear my mom apologizing to hers on the phone. All muffled. Eventually I hear her leave.

"You're cool, little bro" Eric pats me on the back, and only then do I let the tears escape. I have been sitting on the floor in the garden since it happened. Just staring into space. But the tears are coming out now.

"Hey, hey, Cor, cool guys don't blubber like babies! You're nearly seven, you're a big boy now."

I sniff, momentarily keeping the tears in again. My eyes face my older brother's and I almost cry again, but I don't. I need to keep them in forever from now on. Big boys don't cry. Boys don't cry. I don't cry. Not for Topanga, not for anyone.


	3. The End of the Lost Years

My social life has been pretty good for the past 5 years. People don't think I'm a geek, I'm not particaularly cool, like shawn, but I have significant friends.

And i have no idea how I ended up in this mess. Handcuffed to a locker, with hippie creepo Topanga Lawrence chained to my other hand.

She looks like she's about to kiss me, but I can't allow that to happen. Imagine my social life, it would spiral downwards if I _kissed a girl_. And Topanga Lawrence at the least. Sure, shes cute, but she's a hippie, a real soul woman. I'm not into that...I think.

But despite the girl, I'm not ready to kiss one. Any of them. Time moves slowly, as she advances. At least she knows what she wants. I am sweating, and my heart is palpitating. I'm not ready for this, it means commitment, it means teasing, and shipping. It means the loss of my freedom.

I might have been like that once, but I can't.

Until her lips properly touch mine. Those soft, adorable, full lips that make mine melt.

And suddenly all the memories return. The memories that I was keeping locked in a box at the back of my mind since that day. Since the day I betrayed my one true love.

Holding hands at 1, climbing over crib rails. Nap time, Feeny, Shawn, Candy Rings, and Fireflies.

I know what I need now. I need Topanga Lawrence. From now up until my life ends.

But I can't tell her that. Not now.

Since I was born, until the day of the Fireflies, I was walking through life with the perfect girl. Then I made the worst mistake of my life.

The kiss seems so much longer than it is, and as she pulls away, I think I push her away, from reflex and worry about my reputation. But I shouldn't care about that anymore. I'm older now. I was wiser as a child, when I didn't care what criticism came towards us.

For 2 years Shawn tried to get us back together. I ignored him, and he gave up, and followed along with my teasing her, the hippie outlaw of the class.

No more. I'd rather catch Fireflies for the rest of my life, as long as it's with Topanga Lawrence.


End file.
